How to Teach Kids to Give Compliments

Inside: Help kids speak with kindness and give compliments with these compliment cards printable cards.

My youngest is amazing at noticing amazing things about other people.

She notices new haircuts, new shoes, and really pretty ladies who pass us in the store.

And then she whispers the compliment to me.

She didn’t quite have the confidence to tell the pretty lady just how pretty she was.

I whispered back that she could tell her the lady instead of me because she would probably love to hear that.

But she couldn’t do it. Which is okay.

We have to keep practicing to help our kids to give compliments so they intentionally speak with kindness more often.

Why it’s important to teach kids how to give compliments:

We are raising our kids to be kind, compassionate, and empathetic people.

Our goal is to get our kids to speak and act with kindness more often, with less reminders from us. But we have to help them and show them how to spread that kindness to others.

And that includes teaching them how to give compliments.

Compliments are a simple, normal, everyday act of kindness we can encourage our kids to do. Because compliments lift other people up, build their confidence, and boost their self-esteem.

When we get into a habit of celebrating others, celebrating what we like about them, and recognizing what makes other people special, we make the world a kinder place.

How to Encourage Kids to Give Compliments:

1. Model and give them compliments

Give your kids compliments often.

Let them know you like how hard they’re working and how kind they are, and how much you like the way they did their hair.

Compliment their artwork and how good they are at math, and how much you love their new sparkly shoes.

When we model the behavior we want from our kids, eventually, it sinks in.

2. When someone compliments you, take it graciously

Speaking of modeling, show them how to take a compliment when someone gives you one.

It can feel awkward to graciously take a compliment when we’re not used to it, but you could say “thank you,” and “that made my day” or “that was so sweet of you.”

Then tell your kids how those compliments made you feel and why you appreciated them.

3. Show them how to give compliments

We can intentionally teach our kids how to give compliments.

We can ask them what they like about someone else to help them brainstorm.

We can give compliments based on:

something they’re wearing: sparkly shoes, new backpack, fuzzy sweater
personality: kind, funny, compassionate
the skill they’re good at: math, art, making their bed
physical feature: hair, smile, eyes

4. Make Compliment Suns

Help them give compliments to their friends with this friendship craft.

They will fill up the sun with compliments for their friends.

5. Write down compliments with this free printable

Encourage your kids to give compliments out loud by first practicing on paper. They can write down their compliments and hand them out as a way to practice giving verbal compliments.

They can write down why they like people which will feel easier than saying them out loud.

You can download these Compliment Card freebies below.

6. When they tell you a compliment about someone else, encourage them to tell the person.

My daughter has so many compliments to give out to others. But she always whispers them to me instead.

For the past two years, I’ve been telling her that when she has something awesome to tell someone…especially another girl or a woman…to tell them to their face.

And the constant reminders are working. My neighbor came over the other day and my daughter immediately said in one breath,”I love your sweater. And I like your shoes. And I love your hair.”

My neighbor thanked her profusely and asked if she could stop by each day to get more compliments because they made her day.